It was an interesting night last night reflecting on some of the comments/ observations from both WJT and WanderingGondola in yesterday's post (here). The post in question had to do with a song I had listened to called "It Only Gets Better". As part of that post, I included a couple versions of the art the band uses, which involves an empty chair and a sunflower sitting on it.
Both the chair and the sunflower had some meaning for me. The sunflower due to reasons already beaten to death over multiple posts on this blog (i.e., Elanor), and the chair for reasons I will go into shortly. Here is one of the pictures I shared in the post:
I do not have any familiarity with Tarot cards, but into this void of ignorance stepped WJT. He noted that this imagery of a chair and sunflower is based on the Queen of Wands card. Here is a representation of that card:
Honestly, this is one where I would have probably looked at these two pictures together and completely missed the connection, but after having it called out for me, and looking at it a bit more closely, it is pretty obvious. Even more so for the story that comes out.
In my response to WTJ in the comments, I noted that if this is so, then in the picture I posted we seem to be missing a Queen, and then asked "I wonder where she went?" Little did I know this simple question would create a cascade of thoughts that seems to have crystalized into something that I think is true.
Later that night, I had the funny realization that I have heard and actually made connections to another song that involved the implied fact that a Queen was not sitting, or to be found, on her throne. That song is called Kings and Queens, by Ava Max. The opening lines to this song, and the repeated chorus line, goes:
If all of the kings had their queens on the throne
We would pop champagne and raise a toast
To all of the queens who are fighting aloneBaby, you're not dancin' on your own
The line implies, at the outset, that the kings do not yet have their queens on the throne, and the queens (at least some of them) are 'fighting alone'. For quite some time, actually, I have associated this song with the Being I know as Ilmare-Eowyn, for a few reasons. I won't go into all (or really any) of them here, but if you know her story arc as both Eowyn and Deseret (Izilba), I think you would find quite a lot of relevant material if you were to go through the song lyrics.
So, if Ilmare-Eowyn had walk-up music like American baseball players do when they step up to the plate, this might be one of them. Here is the song:
Anyway, I just introduce that song to demonstrate that in many ways a Queen absent from her throne has been on my mind for quite some time, and this song came back to my head last night to remind me.
The question I asked in my comment yesterday in wondering where the Queen is, is also one I would further remember, as my thoughts gained steam, that I had asked before in a dream over 2 years ago.
In that dream, I was talking to a female of extreme 'height' - it was hard to actually get a sense of our relative sizes, but I sensed that I was very small compared to her, and I was standing on something like a table where I could be at least be closer to her face, or at least have the perception that I was closer to where her voice was coming from. I couldn't see her face, however, and we were discussing, of all things, bees. I found that I was teaching this Being about bees, their behavior, etc., which the Being seemed to be interested in, or at least patiently humoring me as I was going on and on. As I was talking about the queen bee, and looking at a very oversized bee frame (as in something that looked like it might have belonged to a giant), I suddenly became very interested and focused on finding the queen of that hive. "I wonder if she is here?" was my thought, and I began to look very closely at the frame to see if I could find her.
As I was doing this, however, I noticed out of the corner of my eye some movement under a ledge at the other side of the table where the Being was. I pulled my attention away from the hive and my search for the queen to see what had made that movement. Out of the shadows emerged a very large (to me) spider. I should have been scared, but this spider was actually kind of cute. It was pink, was dressed up, and I could tell this 'thing' was sort of a pet to this large Being. I was still shocked and appalled and I told the Being that I thought she should get rid of it (I may have even suggested killing it). The Being laughed politely and said something like "Oh no, why would I do that?". She was being nice in her reply, but I could tell my suggestion was extremely offensive. I then woke up.
Strange dream, but I use it to illustrate, again, this ongoing search for a missing queen, or at least one that I was not aware of their location. In this dream, it was symbolized as a bee. As is also hopefully well-known to readers who have read past entries, I strongly associate Eowyn-Deseret with bees, honey, etc. (e.g., the Honey Maid) and I understood the bee queen I was looking for in my dream to represent her.
In any case, that is all to say, this notion of a missing Queen has been fairly prevalent in my story, particularly as I understood more details of what other characters were involved with. Asenath, for example, has been holding down the fort and staring back the darkness on her home next to Eressea, looking after Joseph, while also making the time to come to Idaho and make short work of a Balrog.
Where has Eowyn-Ilmare been during all of this time?
I thought I had cracked that code a little while ago in my post on the Ithil Stone and Eowyn's ascension, in determining that in the aftermath of the events of the LOTR she had used that Stone to ascend to Valinor, specifically the city of Tirion. In determining this, and having this piece of the tale further uncovered, I wrote:
This was the new thought last night - that Eowyn would have used the Ithil Stone to travel to Tirion/ Tun in Valinor, and it is there that she has remained (as a translated Eowyn) until the present day. While in my story, I have assumed that she is there now in Valinor (while we also have Asenath holding down the fort off of Eressea), it surprised me to think that this has been her home since the days immediately following the 3rd age
I believe this is all true still, with the exception of my guess that she has remained there. Based on recent thoughts, I don't believe this is the case. I believe her throne actually sits in Tirion, so if she were there, we clearly wouldn't have an empty throne - the Queen of Wands would be seated (she was called a witch a few times in her story as Deseret-Izilba). But the throne remains empty, so even though she ascended there, she must no longer be there.
In summary, she did ascend to Tirion, but at some point after this, is no longer found there.
If this is the case, then where is she?
I found my answer this morning, and it is an answer that will make literally no sense or really have any significance to anyone outside of one or two people reading this blog, as I will have to introduce another place to the already confusing list of strange names for others.
I have shown over several attempts and years that I am a terrible translator of the words I have been sitting on since 2019 and 2020. However, a few things have become more clear as I have gone through this recent blog-writing exercise, and one of them involved a statement involving Ilmare-Eowyn.
On March 3-4, 2020 came a very short Elvish phrase. This actually came right after words I have shared in a previous post of a "sun moon time" (which would have been March 1 - see this post). Here is the phrase:
Lorien twingiliant eru dornu ras
I am not sure who is saying this, or who it is being said to. In terms of overall context, a group of people would have been made recently made aware that 'Holy Places' were not yet ready after being brought somewhere, or at least they weren't 'here' (wherever they were - I haven't gone into this part of the story yet, but plan to at some point). Joseph is still being convinced to go home to safety, and the first advance crew would leave 'little' Eressea on March 11 to begin the mission to retrieve the Sawtooth Stone.
So there is a lot going on, and in the middle of all of that is the phrase above.
Up until a month ago or so, I had no real idea on what this could be about, at least definitively. Once I realized that we were dealing with sets of twins, however, in the course of this blog journey, with Joseph/Ilmare-Eowyn and Eonwe/ Asenath, then it opened up for me a bit. My translation then became:
Joseph twin-shiniest (Ilmare-Eowyn) Eru-seat peak
That has been the updated translation until today. For reference, Lorien is another name for Irmo, the Valar of Visions and Dreams, who is also Joseph (of Egypt). This is where we get the twin-giliant as referring to Ilmare-Eowyn. Joseph's twin.
I left it at seat, not knowing what this fully meant. It seemed to suggest that Eowyn was in Eru's seat on a peak, somewhere? It didn't make much sense, but that was the translation. I guess Eru could also not be a proper name, but rather the Elvish word for "alone", so she is alone, sitting on a mountain peak somewhere? Again, not much of a story I could pull out of it at that time, so I let it be.
But this morning the thought of this empty, queen-less throne from the song yesterday reminded me of the seat reference in this quote (the throne being a type of seat, I guess), so I decided to look into it a bit more.
It then hit me that 'seat' might not mean chair, and there might be another way to think about this. I went to my trusty online friend, Etymonline.com, who has bailed me out before, and found exactly what I was looking for. Here is one excerpt for the word "Seat":
The word in the sense of "residence, abode, established place" (late 13c.) is an extended use of this, influenced by Old French siege "seat, established place," and Latin sedes "seat." It is perhaps from the notion of a chair set apart for the holder of some position of dignity or authority (a sense attested in English seat from c. 1200). The meaning "city in which a government sits" is attested from c. 1400. The sense of "right of taking a place in a parliament or other legislative body" is attested from 1774.
Thus, the word 'seat' also was used as a word for a residence or place, and here was my answer. Placing that in my translation instead, we have:
Ilmare-Eowyn Eru-place shore (or could be peak still - that works, too)
The significant of this translation is not going to be understood or appreciated by many because Eru-Place isn't a concept or place that has been brought up here. And I won't go into it more here today, either, because I am done with typing. But that is the answer, I believe.
She is in Eru-Place.
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